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coulrophobe

The Mock Turtle's Lessons

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The Mock Turtle went on.

'We had the best of educations--in fact, we went to school every day--'

'I've been to a day-school, too,' said Alice; 'you needn't be so proud as all that.'

'With extras?' asked the Mock Turtle a little anxiously.

'Yes,' said Alice, 'we learned French and music.'

'And washing?' said the Mock Turtle.

'Certainly not!' said Alice indignantly.

'Ah! then yours wasn't a really good school,' said the Mock Turtle in a tone of great relief. 'Now at ours they had at the end of the bill, "French, music, and washing--extra."'

'You couldn't have wanted it much,' said Alice; 'living at the bottom of the sea.'

'I couldn't afford to learn it.' said the Mock Turtle with a sigh. 'I only took the regular course.'

'What was that?' inquired Alice.

'Reeling and Writhing, of course, to begin with,' the Mock Turtle replied; 'and then the different branches of Arithmetic-- Ambition, Distraction, Uglification, and Derision.'

'I never heard of "Uglification,"' Alice ventured to say. 'What is it?'

The Gryphon lifted up both its paws in surprise. 'What! Never heard of uglifying!' it exclaimed. 'You know what to beautify is, I suppose?'

'Yes,' said Alice doubtfully: 'it means--to--make--anything--prettier.'

'Well, then,' the Gryphon went on, 'if you don't know what to uglify is, you are a simpleton.'

Alice did not feel encouraged to ask any more questions about it, so she turned to the Mock Turtle, and said 'What else had you to learn?'

'Well, there was Mystery,' the Mock Turtle replied, counting off the subjects on his flappers, '--Mystery, ancient and modern, with Seaography: then Drawling--the Drawling-master was an old conger-eel, that used to come once a week: He taught us Drawling, Stretching, and Fainting in Coils.'

'What was that like?' said Alice.

'Well, I can't show it you myself,' the Mock Turtle said: 'I'm too stiff. And the Gryphon never learnt it.'

'Hadn't time,' said the Gryphon: 'I went to the Classics master, though. He was an old crab, he was.'

'I never went to him,' the Mock Turtle said with a sigh: 'he taught Laughing and Grief, they used to say.'

'So he did, so he did,' said the Gryphon, sighing in his turn; and both creatures hid their faces in their paws.

'And how many hours a day did you do lessons?' said Alice, in a hurry to change the subject.

'Ten hours the first day,' said the Mock Turtle: 'nine the next, and so on.'

'What a curious plan!' exclaimed Alice.

'That's the reason they're called lessons,' the Gryphon remarked: 'because they lessen from day to day.'

This was quite a new idea to Alice, and she thought it over a little before she made her next remark. 'Then the eleventh day must have been a holiday?'

'Of course it was,' said the Mock Turtle.

'And how did you manage on the twelfth?' Alice went on eagerly.

'That's enough about lessons,' the Gryphon interrupted in a very decided tone.

Not quite Turtle Soup: blurry aquatic notes, with a confusing, contrary splort of iris, ambrette, green apple, vodka, white mint and a squish of lime.


In the imp: It’s definitely minty, but I can smell the other notes in there, too.

On: Mint and lime with an aquatic/ozone (soap to my nose) kick to it. As it dries, I can pick out the apple, too. This is an odd one for me, as I can’t figure out whether I want to (figuratively speaking) drink it or use it as shower gel. It’s a bit like a fresh, soapy cocktail!

Final Verdict: Kind of a smorgasbord scent, and definitely confused – but in a good way. I’m not usually too fond of aquatics, but this one is really interesting and has a nice cool/springy feel to it. It'll be great for hot summer days.

Merged two simultaneous review threads and added the passage from Lewis Carroll. --Shollin

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I missed the list of notes when I first saw this, because of the long text passage...I didn't have any idea what to expect!

 

In the imp: aquatic and minty, light, slightly fruity and refreshing.

 

On my skin: mint tea!! Oh yes, this is a wonderful, fresh mint tea sipped in the shade at the edge of a pool in the summertime.

 

The green apple must be what makes it so crisp and juicy, and the lime squish gives it a slightly bubbly, citrusy kick. The mint is the strongest element in it though, floating luxuriously over everything else -- I know tea isn't listed in it but I swear it smells like tea.

 

The aquatic notes drift in the background, never too strong...just smells a bit like you are near some fresh, clean water. More like swimming pool water than an ocean/sea or even river water, though.

 

I know scents like this don't last very long on me but I will try this in my locket when I get it. It would be great for the summer, very refreshing, and a nice surprise if you're like me and don't normally like aquatics. It's not overly minty either, so if things like Tulzscha were too much for you, it doesn't have that toothpastey mint quality.

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In the bottle: Lime and Mint!

 

On: Still getting the lime but the mint dominates - for about 5 minutes. Then there is more of a powdery tea scent that goes slightly soapy on me. My skin just eats this up. I reapplied after 10 minutes because it had faded so much.

 

After slathering and then waiting another 20 minutes this is a very light soap scent - stupid skin. This smells awesome in the bottle! Might be a good reason for me to buy a scent locket (like I need a reason)

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The Mock Turtle's Lessons:

 

In the imp, it smells like red kool-aid (what? red's a flavour!) or maybe fruit punch Gatorade. It's very sweet and apple to my nose. I'm not getting any aquatics in the vial at least.

 

On my skin, I'm getting mint, but a very light mint. Nothing sharp like Tulzcha. It's softening up pretty quickly. It kind of smells like a shower gel, but not soapy at all. I'm still getting a light hint of apple and lime. It's definitely not red at all anymore and it actually smells like a pale green. It's a confused scent. And frankly, it's nothing like I would usually wear, but I'm liking it a lot.

 

The verdict: I don't get the usual aquatic effect from this at all. No soap, no ozone, nothing. It's a very light, minty fruit scent to me. It kind of smells like a mojito to me. Mmm...mojito.

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Imp

From the imp, this is a light, fresh blend. The tart apple is most evident but it is nicely matched with gentle florals and other very whitish scents. I am surprised I cannot catch the mint from the get go.

 

Wet

Ah. Now there is the mint. It is a gentle mint, though. It is not the strong, powerful mint of Cathode and Envy. In light of the many other mints, this one is almost delicate. Also, it is quite pretty and fresh. The mint remains dominant, but I can start catching the other notes peeking out from behind it.

 

Dry

Incredible. This starts out very lovely, but very soft. When it dried, there was perfect harmony with all the notes and the result is one of the most delicately beautiful blends I have tried. I think what I smell the most now is the ambrette and iris, but the green apple and mint are closely after them. I can catch just a hint of the mint—exactly the way I love it. This also has fantastic staying power on me. I have had it on for hours and it still is going “stong” (but in the most soft, delicate way it possibly).

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in the vial: citrussy, clean, a touch of apple...i am not an ozone fan so putting it on makes me trepiditious.

 

wet: minty note peeks in, now some mints i love, some go, oh no bad, on me, this one is pretty nice, the apple is still there and it is actually making my mouth gleep a bit, i am also detecting the vodka (maybe that is what is makin me gleep :P. this is fairly clean (assuming the mention of ozone) but definitely didn't go soapy.

 

as it dries this becomes a lime, apple mint blend w/ a soapy edge, it is clean, fruity and pretty dang light. i like this...which surprised me a bit.

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On me, this starts out like boozy liquorice, then becomes citrus-mint. It is definitely a cool, refreshing, scent. Although Turtle is a delightful blend, it lasts less than 3 hrs and sneaks off to leave only a faint trace of white musk.

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On wet - tonic. Dry, crisp, citrus tonic. Over ice it might be a cocktail.

 

Drying down - mint and lime are both evident. This is a fresh crisp citrus scent. The mint isn’t overpowering (as it often is on my skin), it's light and clean. Having reread the description, apple and vodka - definitely possible, but it's all well blended.

 

It holds close to the skin, and the duration is about 3 hours.

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At first it's bright and minty. Very slight lime twang to it, but mainly mint. Then almost immediately it turns into a whole lot of lime. Tangy. Probably from the apple. This is actually pretty nice for a minty scent, but it's still a little bit too minty for me personally. Quite bright and fresh-smelling, though, and I don't get soap from this at all. And it's quite soft for a mint -- not bold.

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In the imp: A fruity, minty aquatic -- kind of like a mojito, really.

 

On, wet: Mint is very strong. The fruit gives it a slightly bubblegum note.

 

Drydown: The bubblegum note fades off pretty quickly. The result is a light, airy aquatic with a minty edge.

 

I would love a shower gel or soap that smelled like this. I like mint, but not necessarily as an all-day perfume.

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First on, this actually reminded me a lot of LUSH's blueberry Catastrophe Cosmetic mask. Looking at the listed notes, I am not at all sure why I got that impression. :P

 

On me, this fades really fast, to the point that it's completely gone before I've even worn it a full half hour. During the few minutes that it lasted on my skin, The Mock Turtle reminded me a lot of toothpaste, all mints and aquatics. I don't get any fruity notes at all :D

 

I wanted to love The Mock Turtle's Lessons, but I don't think that I could ever really wear this one. I was glad that it was so light, though.

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This is so, so faint on my skin- even with my nose plastered against a freshly applied patch of this wet, it's barely there. Sadly. I like what I can smell, but mostly it's nothing-scented, and as it dries it disappears even more. I get a hint of something fresh and soft, maybe a bit of apple? Maybe something aquatic? But mostly my wrist, and nothing more. Sniffle. The wee bit I can smell reminds me a tiny bit of Juke Joint, which I adore.

 

No 5mL for me. If this were a little stronger scented I'd love it, but for now it gets a 2.5 out of 5 for being way too faint. I had this experience with Sudha Segara too, unfortunately. I guess it just soaks into my skin or something.

Edited by LittleGreyKitten

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On first application, I get fresh green apple and a swath of mint. If I sniff carefully, I can smell the iris as well, but I don't get much more than that. This is definitely an aquatic scent however, gently and sweetly lapping against my ankles. I find it very calming, even though I wouldn't necessarily wear it as perfume. This one will definitely go on my bottle wishlist.

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I bought the imp before seeing the notes, so this was a pleasant surprise! Actually, I normally don't go in for "green" scents. They normally just smell antiseptic and cold to me. But this is a green that's not herbal, and I like it a lot! Juicy, minty but not too minty, a pleasant jumble of bluish-green smells. I'm not sure of a bottle or not, but it's a really cute, fun scent.

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Preconceived notions:

 

I actually bought an imp of this before seeing the notes because I had to have it for the name alone, Alice in Wonderland fan that I am, but I'm waffling over whether it'll work now that I know what's in it. The green apple, ambrette, mint and vodka sound good, but aquatics often give me hives and I don't like florals or lime, but I'm looking forward to trying this anyway. :D

 

First sniff:

 

Ooh, pretty! Green and fresh...limey, appley but somewhat herbal at the same time. It's not my normal kind of scent, but I like this so far! :D

 

Wet on skin:

 

I like this even more on my skin. On me, it turns to a minty aquatic with a tiny, tiny hint of apple. It's fresh and clean smelling, but not laundry detergent-ish.

 

Dry down:

 

Powdery mint with just a hint of aquatics. I think I may be allergic to this, unfortunately. Aquatics tend to give me hives and my wrists are starting to itch. I'd wear this in my scent locket, but I prefer the scent on my skin to the scent in the bottle. :D

 

The bottom line:

 

I really like the scent of this, but my allergies have other ideas, unfortunately. I'll hang onto my imp, but I'm not going to be getting a bottle of this. :P

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In Bottle: Apple martini

 

On Skin: From the bottle to the skin a lot changes. It’s no longer an apple martini. The mint kicks in right away and along with the lime is very sharp and tart. I also get a strong tea note, which isn’t listed in the description. The scent is very light, I really have to breathe in to smell it. The aquatice are there, but not soapy, just a little watery that helps dilute the tea note I smell. The apple has faded into the back, it isn’t a fruity scent at all on me. There is also a soft musky note in the background, not standing out, but giving a nice base. I don’t smell the iris… hmm… Overall this is a sweet minty tea, very light… and it’s staying power is very minimal. It faded to almost nothing in about an hour.

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Rating (on skin): 3/5

Summarised in a word or two: Shower gel?

 

Preconceived notions: I really don't know! It could be lovely, it could be horrible.

 

In the imp: Light and airy, this one. Apple, mint and a bit of lime.

 

On skin, wet: Lime and vodka, and a little bit of mint and apple. This is very aquatic besides. Is there anise in this?

 

On skin, dry: Ambrette, vodka, green apple, mint and lime. Very odd, this one. I can't shake the undertone of something anise- or liquorice-y. The vodka in this makes it a very unique scent, even BPAL-wise.

 

Conclusion: I completely understand the "shower gel" comment - it does remind me of something you'd find in a shower gel, perhaps called Apple Martini or Apple & Mint. It's not bad, and I don't dislike, it's just not something I'm too keen on. I think it's the lime and/or apple.

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This started out very light and bright; aquatic and a touch of crisp lime. Tart apple and a hint of vodka came through after a while, actually it all kind of blended to a light G&T kind of fragrance. Very nice, but it vanished without a trace.

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Wow, that was fast.

 

I really, really liked the Mock Turtle. Apple and lime are two of my favorite scents, and the aquatics were indeed blurry and soft and perfect. And I didn't catch more than a faint whiff of the mint, which allayed my fears of smelling like an Altoid. What? We all have our little phobias...

 

But I applied this sweet, tangy-watery Turtle about half an hour ago, and it is gone. And I don't just mean really faded; I mean literally I can smell nothing but my skin.

 

And that is very sad.

 

ETA: Maybe it was a fluke? I tried it again, and while it didn't stay very strong, it did loiter about on my wrists for hours - just a flirty whiff of something very nice. If I pressed my nose to my skin, all I could pin down was the ambrette and iris - the rest of the 'contrary splort' was indeed contrary and tended to flitter in and out of sniffability.

 

It grows on me.

Edited by redlisse

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I love the Mad Tea Party sub-cat, so was/am so excited to see all the new blends being added. The Mock Turtle's Lessons was one of the first things I tested when my order arrived---and when I opened it up, I was taken aback by the incredibly realistic smell of green apple. At this point I should be used to the quality of Beth's notes, but sometimes they still take my breath away.

 

On my skin, it's apple and mint in equal portions, with a bit of lime and a touch of the linen-y smell that I get from the White Rabbit. It's very invigorating, and a non-traditional aquatic. It does resemble a refreshing summer drink, like an apple martini crossed with a mint julep.

 

On the drydown, it's a muddled mint, much mellower than it was out of the gate. I'll surely keep my imp for the hot weather ahead.

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In the imp: Apple, Lime, hint of mint aquatic. Yummy.

On, it morphs rapidly from bright green fresh crisp apple aquatic to perfumy iris aquatic. I only detect mint in the very beginning, then it dissapears. Same with the apple. I love it in the imp, but don't love it on, so won't be getting a bottle, unless I invest in a scent locket. Then, this would be the perfect spring and summer scent.

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I was super excited to try this, becuase in the imp it smelled delicously light and refreshing - apply and minty and crip.

 

after about 30 second on my skin it turned soapy and faint and w/in 3min had dissappeared completely. I might try putting it in a room spray for the summer, but beyond that, I will sadly not be using much of this one.

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To me, this is a girly version of Twenty-One. I don't get much apple or mint at all, and what's left smells like the gibson I tried last week... all premium vodka and fresh lime juice. (Which is good, because I love gibsons and hate apple-tinis!) I think I'll stick with Twenty-One, as I prefer the juniper, but I'd recommend Mock Turtle for those who don't like juniper as much as I do. This is very light, limey and pretty. A good one for spring/summer for sure.

 

ETA: I tried this again yesterday, and now I finally understand what you all are talking about when you say "it turns to soap." It went from light green cocktail to "I just washed my hands with limeish soap." Poor old turtle.

Edited by Spring Snow

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In the imp: Fresh n' minty green apple.

 

On wet: Fresh n' minty green apple - with a sweet, somewhat licorice-y undertone.

 

Drydown: The apple faded, the minty licorice notes remained, and now I'm (finally!) getting a soft breath of lime swirling into the mix - a fresh and subtle combination of scents. If I really press my nose against my skin, I can also detect something kinda warm and faintly...amberish (the ambrette?). I tend to dislike ambery stuff as a rule, but it seems subdued in this blend - like the other notes are keeping it on a tight leash so that it peeks out *just* enough to ground everything.

 

Overall: A perfect summer fragrance, but I have to agree with many of the above reviews: After about half an hour, I can barely detect any scent on my wrist at all. :P This Turtle *should* rate at least a 4/5 for sheer prettiness, but lack of staying power (on me, anyway) drops it down to a 2.5.

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If I had to describe this scent in just a couple of words, I'd say light green. It is bright and cheery, definitely limey (which is the most prominant note to my nose, quite happily).

 

There's a slight alcoholic tinge, but it's like a splach of vodka to flavor the soup, not like a coctail. This is a light chilled summer soup of lime and apple and mint and a touch of something almost creamy (the ambrette?). It is lucious and I may just need a bottle to slather when the mercury rises into the triple digits...

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