impolight

:::BLOOD ROSE::: So far, everything that has come from Rappaccini's Garden has been freakishly delectable! Blood Rose is simply put together with some keenly beautiful notes, so it will, in all plausibility, be another tear-jerker! From the Imp: The Rose and the Wine are beyond luscious here... It's like falling through a crimson cloud. It's a happy drowning. The Dragon's Blood helps things along by adding a depth that is Quenchanted. Blood Rose really out does itself. It is beautiful enough to stand completely on it's own, and would make an impeccable room fragrance. One cannot help but wonder if this might actually be sullied by the clumsy chemistries of the body... On the Skin: For a fleeting moment, the Muscadine qualities flicker across the brain like the dangerous, luminous veins from a purply thunderhead... And then *poof* into oblivion. What lingers, in this case, is a mightily sugared soap. The impressions are a mix of grandmotherly Rose soap and Rose syrup. Ultrapink. Pop. This is not to say it smells at all bad, it simply cannot equate to the caliber of the Rose in other BPAL blends; meanwhile, the Wine and the Dragon's Blood have abandoned the scene. All in all, this might work nicely as a room fragrance in someone's collection, it just didn't pan out well enough with this body-chemistry, specifically, to warrant special attention or as high of a recommendation as other Rose-based scents from the Lab. A 3 or so out of 5.

:::BLACK LACE::: A bottle of this was being practically given away recently, so, how could the opportunity be resisted?Reading the description, it inspired a rankled sort of covetousness. Missed the 13th anniversary? Poo. And, more poo, also. From the notes listed in the blend, this was expected to be delicate, or perhaps a reserved sort of quietude. Lace almost implies quite a bit of fussy acrobatics as not to muss the handiwork... One supposes it could also trim a hankie. From the bottle: Mmmm! Actually, this is more than a bit of the old formidable! The strongest pair of notes, at first impression, are the Cognac and the Indian Musk. Together, these have an almost Leathery effect. Spice and antiqued wood factor into this as well. At this phase, Black Lace has the feel of being something that the nose would detect in a library at a very prestigious library where your grandfather studied archeology... Or had wild throes with grandma having read one too many passages by Anais Nin... Black Lace seems, so far, like it would compliment some of the Lab's formulas like, 'Antikythera Mechanism' or 'Snake Oil'. On the Skin: Lovelier still! It is insanely difficult not to feel terribly underdressed while wearing the fragrance that is Black Lace... Unless you happened to try this on just before entering the opera house in London, or some other such frillery... Then you are just plain despised for your obscenely unjustifiable amount of good fortune. So far, the Tobacco has been very ... genteel in it's behaviour. It is hardly noticed, especially alongside that wonderful, wonderful incense fragrance... erotiCopal? Black Lace is equally formal and gorgeous on either Him or Her. Black Lace is perfectly spellbinding... Could be even moreso as it ages. Thank you, Schnanni! Black Lace gets a 5 out of a yummy 5! Hats off to the Lab!

:::VELVET TIGER::: The artwork on the Label of Velvet Tiger is crazy... The eyes not only follow your position, they glow and they quiver. This could have been named, aptly, Velvet Tyger. From the Bottle: Mmmm, Vetiver! This Vetiver bypasses the septum and Two-fisted-punches you in the tonsils for sport. Assertive! For those who aren't fans of Vetiver, there are doubts that this would make it to the, 'put it on the skin' phase. Morpher or no, confidence would be finite at best. What might be a bit of Cedar seems as though it is in here somewhere. Cedar has also been recognised for it's subtlety. In some cultures. On the Skin: Hey, what happened? Vetiver has taken a jet-propelled nose-dive; a brilliant ripple of citrus now showcasing itsself in the footlights. There's no Cedar in this afterall; it's just they way that the Cinnamon and the Teak unify for a spot of Hellraising in this blend. Sneaky! The Black Licorice in this is... Shiny. One can almost feel a smoothly laquered pastel of the stuff sitting dead-center in the tongue, waiting to be savored. The more that Velvet Tiger develops, the more glamorous it becomes. Here, the idea had been that it would be something masculine in a virile, almost tropically earthy way. Actually, this emerges languidly from a velvety-orange chrysalis, it's serpentine hips all asway, it's navel bejeweled. This could be a unisex fragrance, but there is no small measure of dread that this would linger on His skin with a sparkly sort of lisp. The Wife is a sworn enemy of Vetiver and refuses to participate. From across the room, the opening of the bottle elicited cries of, "Wet ashtray!" and "Get out!" My motives are in question. There are allusions that I am on a quest for celibacy... *sigh* Velvet Tiger is gorgeous. It still earns a 5 out of 5.

:::THANATOPSIS::: This one had arrived quite some time ago as a Frimp, but had rolled behind a desktop canister and had lay in wait until rediscovered yesterday... Novel! Thanatopsis: Meditation upon Death? Maudlin! Loving this by title alone thus far! Being a simply constructed formula lends a great deal of promise (any and all of the Evergreen notes presented by the Lab have been, so far, nothing short of stellar). From the Imp: Scary-delicious at this point. The Musk was much more prominent than originally anticipated given the potency of the other notes in this blend. Pine is a close second, yet moreso in it's wooden aspect than the sharpness of needles or resins. Thanatopsis seems to be more about freshly cut timber at tyhis phase. Juniper is but the slightest suggestion here; something more carried on the breeze than outright asserting itsself alongside it's arboreal cousin and Musk. Goodness, this is terribly swoony! The Musk has this... Clay-like element that is very posh;kind of like getting the royal treatment at a very exclusive Cascadian spa. Perhaps a Scandanavian feel... There is this mental image of vast storm windows, turbulent, grey skies, and polished woods... There is a melancholy feel here, but at this phase it's too high-end to be really devastating. On the Skin: Ahh... Here, the trees become otherworldly, mournful sentinels. Here, the darkness truly sprawls akimbo. On the skin, Thanatopsis has much the same effect as staring too long into the glamors of a downpour only to realise, too late, that you look a fright, sopping-wet and ready to catch your death. Thanatopsis evokes a shiver and inspires yearning to don layers and bundle up against the chill. Thanatopsis is crisp, clean and full of mighty and respectable power. Ideal for Him or Her. Thanatopsis is an easy 5 out of 5.

:::CYKRONASHIAN CATNIP::: This one arrived in the post on the close end of light-speed... Thanks a billion, Puddin'! There is always a thrill that evokes tippy-toeing and impish facial expressions when one of these lovely parcels donning that orange BPAL sello-tape materializes in the box! The artwork on the label of Cykronashian Catnip is dizzying. Footballery aside (Any bets the cephalopod picked this one?), this brought an onslaught of adrenaline because of newfangled Lovecraftian connotations! Whee! From the bottle: What a handsome devil of a fragrance this is! A batch of something apothecarious, er, medicinal vigorously mixed and presented in an Oaky, wooden bottle. Old-timey. Barber-shoppy. Well-scrubbed, neatly parted, waxed, powdered, starched, affably fortified tonic. Elixir of the sensibly dapper. Dashing! On the Skin: Kablam! Olfactory palpation! Here, it works almost exactly as described... Deep Mossiness, Woody Oranges. Superb! Cykronashian Catnip is an illuminated fragrance. Cykronashian Catnip strobes forth into the ether like an aquamarine tinted Christmas Gaslight. This shares some properties with Phoenix Steamworks' Aleopile, but without the metallic contraption glintiness. Cykronashian Catnip is far more... Organic. Eco-friendly, but more in the way of whatever the extraterrestrial equivalent word for it would be. The passing of "Mama-Wuss" has left an aching void where life would ordinarily iclude a feline matriarch, so there have been no kitties to test the Catnip hypothesis with... But this is good since there is little time for wrists being pwned and mated. The glorious smell will have to do! On Him, this is classy in a randy-scoundrel sort of way. On Her, Cykronashian Catnip is Purrfect. Buy some now! 5 out of 5!

It is unbelievable that anyone would ever consider parting with a bottle of Pirate Moon; especially considering that it is commemorative of celebrating the unity of our Lady Elizabeth to her beloved... Nevertheless, some of us are more fortunate than others, and when a bottle of Pirate Moon surfaced in a swap, there was a lightning-quick commandeering of it, to be sure! Pirate Moon has proven to be love at first sniff! It took some time to get the brain around this in the respect that there is nearly an instant favorable bias based on the Scallywag iconography and the maritime associations assigned to this blend. This is compounded by the fact that this formula came from the Lab! From the Opened Bottle: Wow... Pirate Moon is everything it promises! The Ambergris & Lime make the first introductions, and make a promising allusion toward the briny, kelpy texture of oceanic adventurousness! The flapping of fronds in a high gale can practically be heard, so distinctive is the Coconut Palm note! A couple of years ago, during a springtime jaunt out to St. Augustine, Florida, we were strolling along the surf when a heady fragrance caught me up in a fresh cocoon and we had discovered that it was this very stuf! Brilliant!The same can be said of the Grass note which you can almost feel whipping against your bare shins along with the shift of sands beneath your feet! The sweetness of Date is here, adding just enough sugariness to get your salivary glands on the squeeze.The Warm Leather is also very, very good! Yo-ho at the ready! On the Skin: Boy-Howdy! Ampage! Grass, Limes, Palm, and Leather! Whew! The woodsiness now comes out to play too! Here is the Sandalwood, Lingum, and Balsam! The skin nearly creaks! There is a sweet cigar in hear somewhere, begging to be chewed almost as much as it is smoked, and the sweetness of it is the nicest contrast to the crust of saltiness that has built up in the corners of your mouth! There is more than a little surprise that there is no Kelp, Bladderwrack, Seaweed, Sea Moss, or Marine Accord in Pirate Moon. Thar be not even a mote of Ozone inscribed in the notes O' these Labbies, arrr! Regardless, a clear association with all things seafaring, rum-swilling, and plundering ahve been flawlessly icorporated into the formula that is Pirate Moon! One cannot help but roar, swagger, and spoil for a wee bit of bloodshed when wearing this fragrance. The Wife even fixed Her best predatory gaze upon the source of this fragrance... "What is THAT?" She demands.She is told that it is Pirate Moon and She wholeheartedly approves. It feels neat to be the quary! Pirate Moon is certainly unisex. On Her, Pirate Moon is bawdy, lewd, lascivious and deliciously erotic, though fully equipped to kick your sorry ass! On Him, Pirate Moon is your (treasure) chest swollen full of his cocky air; he reeks of recklessness, high-spirited adventure, dripping wet thrust, parry and sinews, strong, skillful hands, and a snarling bite at the nape of your neck... And a taste of yer ear! Pirate Moon should be resurrected on the regular! This is an awesome fragrance! This is Aces & Eights! A perfect 10!

:::THE SLEEPER::: Okay... This was a first as far as an experience with an "aged" oil goes, so the anticipation has been more than a little...twangy. Time and again, a reviewer would expound on the virtues of aged BPAL formulas. Being newer to this, it felt as though there were an exclusive Hellfire Club of sorts with an elusive portal. anywho, an aooportunity presented itsself where a swapper had purchased an obscene amount of these (who does that?) back in the day, and had reluctantly admitted to the tragedy that not all of her beloved bottles would make it for wearing and so this one was offered up... An oil based on some classic Poe? Bitchin'! The first impressions were the inverse of what some of the original reviewers of this fragrance had opined. Here, there was very little by way of Rosemary's astringence. From the bottle, though Oakmoss was on the lurk, there was not very much at all by way of greenness... This was much more... BLACK. I would concede to there being a trifle of Vetiver in the, "Crypt Musk", but there is something else in it that smells of a deeper excavation. This is black soil with composting, forested herbaciousness flitting throughout! The night blooming Jasmine is nice, luxurious and heady in The Sleeper. Opium Poppy is prettily present as well! While an earlier reviewer already shared their sentiment of favoring the Poppy used in, "On Darkness", it is very nice that it is not even close to shy in this blend at this stage! The nose has yet to identify the Calla lily... S'awright! On the Skin: Blacker still! It would not at all be a surprise that there was a little turpentine in this! In South Africa, there is a variety of Mango that smells so much like Turpentine when a ripe one is opened, the nickname of it's varietal is, "Turpentine Mango". Makes one wonder... Yes, yes, yes.... Black, Black, Black! Oakmoss, "Crypt Musk", Vetiver, Turpentine, Suet, Charwood... The florals are still all here in the outer rim of the firelight, eyes aglint, tittering in frequencies that fall more into the auditory range of bats and spectors, but the fragrance that is The Sleeper has transmogrified from a voluptuary boquet in honor of an impossibly beautiful youth, to a mad, howling, slavering grief that scuttles amid mud, rot, and shadow. The Sleeper is an entirely beautiful fragrance. It is haunting, solemn, and in awe of the brevity with which the lot of us have to endure the overwhelmingly fantastic planet teeming with heartbreak at every turn. 4.8 out of 5

:::VELVET CTHULHU::: When this showed up as a Frimp, it was scarcely believed... Firstly, an Imp like it has had yet to cross the threshhold... Artwork? Notes listed right on the Label? Fortuitous! Lovecraft is well loved and mooned over in this household, but seeing His brainchild rendered in Velvet, no less, made for an especially grand intrigue! First sniff: Huh? Oh, yes! The Review! Silly, Old Impolight! Wow! The scent that is Velvet Cthulhu was almost ENTIRELY different than what was expected from reading the notes. While all of the Lab's blends are unique unto themselves, Velvet Cthulhu stands entirely alone... Freakin' genius! When Wasabi was listed as the First note, the expectation was, generically, watery-eyed sneeziness... So far, none! Cedar and Sage together seemed as though they would bring something assertive if not astringent to the foray... Not yet! Velvet Cthulhu seems to be mostly about the Pu-erh and Touareg Teas at this stage... Translucent and metaphysical ... Impossibly clean! Velvet Cthulhu smells like a place you would very much like to be; steeping away your cares and triviums in a heavenly, bronze washtub wityh a ridiculously large glass of the most enchantingly refreshing iced tea that has ever had the audacity of pleasing your palate to this extent. The Corriander acts as the cool light streaming through a stained glass window the colour of iridescent teal... Goodness, gracious, are those... Harps in the background? On the Skin: My, the sinuses, how they crackle! Here is the Wasabi, yet this is the CLEANEST Wasabi known to hominids. There is a violently green thingy (ia! ia! ?) in Velvet Cthulhu that brings Rappaccini's Hemlock to mind... Fuzzy, fluorescent, Phosphorous green! By the time that Khus and Frankincense come out to play, traipse, and frolic, Velvet Cthulhu might also bear a passing, familial resemblance to Phoenix Steamworks... Nice. Velvet Cthulhu could also be called Robotic Cthulhu... Nice, brassy edge to this! Cthulhu donning battle-armor forged from meteoric alloy... Velvet Cthulhu is a magnificent fragrance. Devastating on Him or Her. Simply 5 out of 5!

:::SNAP-DRAGON-FLY::: Thunderstruck! Snap-Dragon-Fly smelled JUST LIKE a fresh loaf of bread just in from a wood-fire, stone oven! There is this very grainy, doughy, buttery note in this (at first sniff) that is accompanied by a hint of of Ash and cinder! Tricky! Another sniff, less cautious now, reveals gigantic Brandy soaked Raisin! This will nearly make your eyes water! You can just about feel the dry, alcohol sting at the back of your throat! The Plummy note in Snap-Dragon-Fly is excelsior! This smells very much like a succulent, fresh-picked, ripe summer fruit; juicy-fleshed with a taut, tart and shiny skin! Some of the fruity characteristic might come from the Mince Pie ingredient, but there isnt a whole lot of the Brow Sugary Spice, either. The Salty/Buttery element likely comes from the "Suet" note. On the Skin: The Plum in Snap-Dragon-Fly really elevates right alongside the Suet which is really... Peculiar. This delighful incongruence goes hand in hand with the concept of a "Snap-Dragon-Fly". The Frumenty aspect is a nice, rounded-out subtlety... It soothes the spirits as would a steaming bowl of rolled oats in heavy cream with Cinnamon & Sugar. Spectrally, this fragrance falls somewhere between plum-purple and leather, and it has... Shine. Snap-Dragon-Fly's fruitier aspects would compliment Her body chemistry, while the Salty, Brown, Smoky aspects would favor His... All in all, Snap-Dragon-Fly is a pretty good fragrance. This one would wear exceptionally well as a wintry fragrance; at a family gathering, seated round an expansive table. A rousing applause for this 4 out of 5.

:::SEA OF TRANQUILITY::: Some of the favourite floral notes from the Lab, from experience, are Passion Flower and Poppy. Sea of Tranquility was stumbled across in a swap and when research revealed that this formula included both of those together, the thrill of the hunt ensued... From the Bottle: Ah, yes... Both are there in all of their splendor, and so is... Amber!Mmmmmm! The effect is akin to a jousting lance made of flowers/Amber ice cream that's been skillfully slipped up your nose from a full gallop! Delightful! There is the spectral, blue-white glow of Lotus too... Radiantly aquatic and insinuative of Lunar power. The Sandalwood is a bit demure at this stage; you can tell that it's there, but it's like peering through a darkened window of a furniture store and seeing the gleam of outside lighting reflected from the polished surface than in is admiring the smooth craftsmanship in your hand. Buttonweed, if a ton were hurled from a passing aeroplane and the chute failed to deploy, and it fell atop a float in a parade, would remain an unidentified note of mystery... But, this is Black Phoenix Alchemy Lab we're talking about, so confidence is high! Also a surprise was the Rose Otto. Ordinarily as subtle as sleigh-bells at a wake, it was just plain off-the-grid at this phase. Huffing until light-headed did nothing to modify the experience. So far, Sea of Tranquility really is a beaut of a fragrance! On the Skin: Wow! What an incrediblessing! Here is the Rose Otto and it is a magnificent binder with Passion Flower and Poppy. This is a striking floral blend! The florals in Sea of Tranquility are a lovely fantasy brought to fruition by BPAL! The boquet will have your entire skull buzzing in waves, as though by an ecstatic species of electrocution. There is a profound, resonating depth to Sea of Tranquility. The sensation is like a noiseless plummet through a snowbank miles deep... The usage of "white" and "silvery" are brilliant descriptors for this fragrance. Though it hasn't been included in the notes, it also smells as though there is a very clean, very subtle note of White Leather in Sea of Tranquility, similar to the note described in, "White Rider"... Perhaps this is because it is actually Sandalwood? And the similarity has sparked a suggestive relation? Sea of Tranquility is clean, pure, and serene. This is a preposterously beautiful fragrance. The Label artwork is also quite charming. The Woman with stars in her piled hair seeming to hold the Moon aloft is appealing in a classical way... Almost Art deco. Sea of Tranquility is a divine and potent fragrance. On Him, Sea of Tranquility is classic, iconic and elemental. On Her, Sea of Tranquility is celestial, tragic, and immaculate. Sea of Tranquility is a one of a kind fragrance that is one of the greats. 5 out of 5!!!

:::PINK MOOD::: This one had arrived as yet another Frimp! From the Imp came a nutty, buttery sort of essence... Kind of like popcorn butter and Spanish Peanut skins, but not as overtly... Foody. In the background, there is something that is Hot Pink and a demented sort of sweet... Red Licorice? The Wife, inquisitive about this obsession by now leans in and says, "Yes, Red Licorice... And Cinnamon Imperials... And Alfalfa pellets" A quick scan of the Notes reveals that there is Star Anise and Cherry Blossom in this which explains the Red Licorice phenomenon. No Cinnamon, though... The "Alfalfa pellet" remains a mystery... Peony? It is a note unfamiliar thus far. On the Skin: The Butter/Salt really amps at first, and then does a lemming from the olfactory receptors. Now the Anise comes to the fore! This is a bright, otherworldly, metallic Anise that is a dizzying, dazzling glint.Vanilla blooms here too like an explosion in super slow motion. The Violet Leaf and Neroli are perfectly joined as Siamese Twins as they get strewn throughout the overall effect of Pink Mood like so many cinematic garlands... Pink Mood is a very sweet and Glamorous fragrance for Her! 4.8 out of 5!

:::RONIN::: Ronin arrived in the post as a Frimp! Too cool for school! Almost the entire series of "Novel Ideas" was missed out on because it wasn't until the Black Helicopter series that the magic of clicking on the intended Icon was realised (bain dramage, you see). Upon locating Ronin here, in the Forum, and scanning it's components, preconceived notions began to form ( Rice Flour? Oh! Rice FLOWER! Wait... Rice has flowers?) that this might be a mite... Dainty. Oakmoss, thou fillest with great hopes! First Sniff: Mmmmm! Something is remniscent of Sake! Perhaps this is the Rice Flour? The sweetness of Honey is yummy; sticky, brown, and crystalline. There is just enough bite from the Black Pepper to give Ronin some rasp and snarl... Cool! Sandalwood's elegant contours give Ronin just enough poise raise both eyebrows well into the hairline.On the Skin: Ah, here is the Oakmoss! Interplay with the other notes almost gives this the quality of A key-lime pie... This is a very nice fragrance, yet the longer it mingles with familiar body chemistry, the more that the incompatible become apparent. Drat. The Wife's verdict: "baby powder... that's not one of your BPAL's, is it?" *rolls down car window* Ronin is a nice, sweeeeet fragrance, it would just probably go better with a frilly pink something than it would with a top-knot or a katana. 4 out of 5.

:::ALL IN THE GOLDEN AFTERNOON::: The description for All In the Golden Afternoon came as a bit of a surprise... The expectation was that there would be more specifics to the floral notes than, 'Sun Baked Flowers', but the scent has, nevertheless proven delightfully delicious thus far! All In the Golden Afternoon smells like a blissed out laze atop a picnic blanket whilst the sun radiates a peculiarly ticklish fire of sorts. Most noticeable at first breath are the Tangerine, Pineapple and Apricot; as though a marvelous array of tarts and jellies had been included in the afternoon's outdoor repast. The Amber is really quite lovely... In this formula particularly, it is possessed of a concentrated sweetness, as though the essential oil were condensed into a "solid perfume" and secreted away into a scent locket that seconded as a cameo or pendant of sorts. Other reviewers have remarked on All In the Golden Afternoon's Seltzer's prowess, but it took quite a bit of huffing and hyperventilation for this nose to arrive at the same conclusion, yet alone recognise the note at all. Once the note was picked out, however, it took several moments to come back to silly old reality... The Seltzer in this is brilliant! Another mystifying feat of Aromagic! Also brilliant is the note of Sun Baked Flowers, as previously underestimated... This does, in fact smell as though not only the local Wildflowers are drooping, penitent, before the solar onslaught, but the boquet brought along to prettify the picnic has taken to surrendering it's essences into the afternoon ether. On the Skin: The Flowers REALLY come bursting through at this stage! The Seltzer helps with the Amping of the notes, making All In the Golden Afternoon one of the freshest and most delightful examples of floral blends! The Pineapple smells juicy and freshly sliced, which elevates the tangy succulence of this formula... All In the Golden Afternoon almost smells as though a tall, chilled glass of it would be the ultimate in refreshment on a scorcher of a summer's day! All In the Golden Afternoon is a hyper real, larger than life fragrance. A rapturous reverie. A revelry. A rejoicing! On Him, All In the Golden Afternoon is lush, humid, and dreamy. On Her, All In the Golden Afternoon is fresh, quenching, and enchantingly florid. This one gets a 5 out of 5.

:::BLUE MOON::: Hooray for the thrills and chills of good fortune through misadventure! Brian's Blue Moon is to die for, rest assured.There are so may components as to render remarks on individual notes a virtually moot point, yet the fantastical experience that awaits all who would dare sample this formula is innumerable in it's rippling delight, as it were. Brian's Blue Moon is silvery, gilded prose. This blue moon is gallant, courageous, noble, irreverent, hypnotic, seductive, and full of dark and stormy territories, yet impossible to tell by it's smooth and untoubled brow. Blue Moon is frothing, coastal waters. A psychadelic crunching of ice. An eroticised nature-worship. Blue Moon is the tangled tendrils of Byron's torments. Blue Moon is the vast gulf of hope that immortalises an era. Blue Moon is a many splendored revolution beneath the gasps and glories of a meteor shower. Blue Moon is drop-dead-gorgeous! Absolutely breathtaking! The first impressions from the freshly opened 5mL bottle of this fantastical elixir is of an aqueous essence... A body of water as interpreted by a nocturnal flyer. This purest ingenuity is in the fact that it is indulgent in the bluer wavelengths of the spectrum, but the crepuscular aspect filling the vision with a nightworld, and it's beautific satellite orbiting in the firmament like an ivory-skinned skinned citrus fruit afloat in an immense punch-bowl of Blue Curacao takes the genius of it all to an entirely new level .Blue Moon is also suggestive of gazing up at the Moon while swaying in a hammock, high in the treetops, your hair tossed by the wind's mischief... On the Skin: Blackened, skeltal, arboreal silhouettes! Blue Moon is potently suggestive of a pie-eyed 1930's-1940's animated depiction of a blustery night in the boneyard, with toothily grinning man in the moon, tall grasses whipping in the howling wind, bats on the wing, and candlelight flickering through the window on the caretaker's sagging, dilapidated front porch. The longer that Blue Moon wears, the more suggestive it is of pipe organs, rattling chains, remote manors, eyes shining in the dark, tombstones, crystal balls, music from a phantom gramaphone, floaty bits of furniture, etc. This is deliciously creepy and ethereal! Blue Moon calls to mind much of the imagery that H.P. Lovecraft uses in his story, "The Hound". Blue Moon is evocative of a bygone era, and would feel right at home alongside the fragrance oils found in the Phoenix Steamworks category of scents. Spectrally, Blue Moon is pitch black, pine green, midnight blue, royal purple, jackolantern orange, candelabra yellow, ash, and bone. Blue Moon is an omen. Blue Moon is an entity. Blue Moon is a holographic Halloween. Blue Moon is a catastrophically beautiful fragrance. The Maestro Constantine has outdone Himself with the elaborate and spellbinding quality created in this formula, and imparted to masses in the throes of adoration, in the thrall of disbelief. Blue Moon could serve as a unisex fragrance, but there is a strong sentiment that is an advocate for masculinity here... On Her, Blue Moon is a disembodied, gossamer lamentation. On Him, Blue Moon is a gaunt, haunted genius... A stranger in a strange land. Blue Moon cannot wield enough bravado by it's description alone to convey the utter magnificence with which it will bring a most splendid devastation to your day. An exceptional fragrance in all respects. Another 6 out of 5!

:::SERAGLIO::: The Almond in Seraglio is the must distictive note, by far, from a freshly opened Imp of the stuff. There is also a little something at the tail-end of it's virgin ascent into the ether... Honeysuckle, maybe? There is a warm, dark, orangey-brown succulence to this that tempts the salivary glands into overdrive... Imagine an immense Copper urn where Oranges studded with cloves float loazily in a pool of warm honey. On the Skin: Mmmmm! The Cloves catch fire! Exquisite! The Nutmeg in Seraglio gives the Clove an incindiary edge. Upon holding the wrist close for an intimate whiff, the heat practically radiated onto the lips and face! Genius! The Neroli and Bulgarian Rose offer an nice touch. When they mingle with the Almond, the result is quite close to confection! The Sandalwood lends an effet of luxury to Seraglio... Have you ever gotten the royal treatment at a day spa, the feel is precisely the same. Seraglio is amazingly good! Made with Her in mind. 5 out of 5.

:::ABSINTHE::: Rapid-fire blinking did little to dispel a sense of Deja vu when this Frimp had arrived in an order. Then, realization dawned; the review in question was actually Pontarlier... The petting of self can now come to an end... So, what to make of this Bewitching Brew? This is the Green Fairy Herself! No enchanted, Fern-bespattered floral garden of Her birthplace here! Here is the muse, the madness, mesmerizing!Surgically sharp Greenery! Hell, if that's Wormwood that's giving this particular formula it's kick, it should certainly be encouraged by devotees to make it's presence well known in formulas of the future! Absinthe is HEAVY green/black! The Wormwood, Mints, and Anise form a mentholated braid of something that is terrifying and delicious at the same time! Absinthe indeed! For those unfamiliar with it's notes, imagine Jagermeister with the best rootbeer or Sasparilla in the world as its mixer And add something furious and scorched... Hyssop? Cardamom? You can get the Lemon-peel vibe suspended in the air currents just a few moments later, giving Absinthe a luster that verges on... Prehistoric?On the Skin: WOW! The Wormwood's green in this becomes malevolent, vicious, even! This isn't so much an enchantment as it is a murderous sorcery! This is the same violent, radiating sort of green that you get from Hemlock in Rapaccini's Garden. This experience is akin to a late-night sit down in an opulent pub, brimming with old-world charm. On opposite side of the bar, should you crane your neck and peer around the whiskey optics, you spy a comely, doe-eyed lass in a green dress with shimmering, ebon ringlets who returns your gaze with a smirk. By the time you have worked up the courage to address Her, your choice of words in regrettably... Uncouthed. This is the smell of your blood dribbling into a puddle of spilled Absinthe as it mingles with the smell of Her freshly polished boots. Absinthe is worthy of it's status of an iconoclast of conventional folklore. This is obsidian-sharp verdance that washes over a melange of delirium and poetry. The Lemon Peel in this makes for a bright, clean, deluvian feel... As though you're lying, supine, in the tall grass next to a sparkling brook. On Him, Absinthe Is sweet, sinister, and sexy. On Her, Absinthe is vicious, vivacious, and verdant. Another brilliant formula by the Lab. 4 out of 5.

:::THE MONTAUK PROJECT::: Wow! The Montauk Project is seriously delicious! The first whiff that came out of this described a mutated, metallic popsicle! Irradiated refreshment! The Cypress and Pine mingle together with the Sassafrass and Black Gum to create a sweetness that practically squirts into your olfactory receptors. There is also an edgy, greenish-black contour to the Montauk Project that suggests a slithering and formidable doomsday sort of boogeyman lurking just over your shoulder. The swampiness of this formula is a glistening and sensual humidity that sticks to your skin and gulps with it's eyes rolled up into it's head and muffled moans of ecstacy. On the Skin: Sexplosive! Hot! Hot! Hot! The Montauk Project has cackling florals! Crackling florals! Whether it's the Swamp Sunflowers or the Trumpet Creeper is difficult to distinguish, but when this mixes up with Dogwood, Cypress, and Pine, the amping is unheard of! Now, THIS is Alchemy! Tried and TRUE! The Montauk Project is a twisted symphony of seductiveness. And it's BAD... Not the "ungood" version of bad, but the ice cold,collar up, cocksure, killer instinct that takes in a crowd with a glance and, with the slightest of shrugs, can lay the whole thing low... Fans of "Ides of March" and "Golden Priaprus" will find The Montauk Project particularly spectacular. This fragrance is a great, swooning masterpiece! The Montauk Project is a fantastical, multidimensional, interspecies hybridization of stellar proportions! On Her, The Montauk Project is a startling, gittering cacaphony of larger than life presence. On Him, this is shapeshifting, megalomaniacal glamour that slips directly into the bloodstream and sings a frickin lullaby! This stuff is TIP TOP! Not a soul can bow low enough before the Lab! A devastating 5.5 out of 5!

:::PHANTOM TIME HYPOTHESIS::: Hooooo, Dayumn! This formula's a scorcher! The formula is remniscent of, both, Lilac Vegetal from Pinaud, and 4711! Both are classics, dating back well over a century and a half ago, and both, likely inspired from traditional recipes dating back centuries before that! Crazy! The effect of Phantom Time Hypothesis is immediate; Great, big, goobersome grinning... Anyone remember the episode of, "Tom and Jerry" when Tom, whenever receiving a sharp blow to his head, thinks he is and behaves, shrilly like a mouse? Yeah, well... The Lilac Vegetal is the most obvious in this one... A much, much beloved element from a classic, barbershop theme... Ah, Lilacs... The incorruptible fragrance of the saints! Mmmmmm! Good stuff! The Lab has yet to disappoint with any formula containing Lilac's essence. It always induces a state of the most profound well-being and good fortune. Gumdragon isn't anything familiar in the slightest, so identifying it is going to be implausible at best. Before stumbling across Phantom Time Hypothesis, awareness of Gumdragon's existence was nil from personal experience, but putting money on its being absolutely out of this world would explain alot! The Aloe in this gives a very refreshing impression and adds a shower-fresh element to the barbering aspect of the Vegetal. Phantom Time Hypothesis is good enough to make your nasal passages shiver and cramp. It's hard to conceive of how they can get things to smell so incedibly effin' good at the Lab! Enchantments? Alchemy! You bet'cha! There is something in Phantom Time Hypothesis (the Damask Rose working in tandem with Balm or Ambergris, perhaps?) that behaves very much like a golden Incense sort of note. The Orange Water is ludicrously delicious... This makes Phantom Time Hypothesis gorgeous enough to have it's own display case reserved at the Smithsonian! This has formidable throw and staying power alike. A relatively modest application lasts and lasts; bringing formidable verve and dazzle with it. Phantom Time Hypothesis could actually be seamlessly incorporated into the Phoenix Steamworks line. This could be depicted as ocean-blue armor with a preposterously large aquamarine set in it's helmet that absorbs solar radiation and gives the wearer the ability to... Time travel. Spectrally, Phantom Time Hypothesis is electrified cerulean, chrome, mint, and fluorescent creamsicle. While this formula is fresh enough for a unisex application, it has all the hallmarks of being a dashing, elegant and classy fragrance for Him. Undiluted divinity! 5.9 out of 5!

http://media.ebaumsworld.com/picture/hippyjump50/crop-circles-advertising-101.jpg Wheat, Maize, and Barley; the trifecta of a good, nutritious breakfast! Traipsing Through the Crop Circles exhumed a memory of a group of locals who had this psychadelically inspired idea to tether up some 2X4's and set about flattening a swath of tall grasses in a vacant lot that would imply that visiting extraterrestrials had senses of humor similar to that of dirty-minded eighth-graders...Town officials responded with vigorous mowing and looks of consternation. Traipsing Through the Crop Circles seemed delish via the Lab's description ( as did the vast majority of formulas from the Black Helicopter Series), so a 5 mL bottle was adopted at this past Bat's Day Black Market. From the Bottle: Ooooh! What a great, prickly, bristling, brown fragrance! Corn-Silk, Toast, and Barley-Malt! This could be on the inside of a World-class microbrewery, Though twenty times as delicious!Imagine grilled corn and the best cracker you've ever tasted combined and carbonated, and you sort of get the beginnings of a synthenesia cross reference. While this makes a briliantly perfect summation of Crop Circles, this would also exemplify the same general theme of fragrances like Hay Moon, Scarecrow, John Barleycorn, etc. Traipsing Through the Crop Circles could easily embody the entity of Worship that reigns over the Harvest. Traipsing Through the Crop Circles is a menacing, furious scent at this phase... But in a good way! Imagine a newly discovered hornet that is actually... Mammalian. There is also something almost violently, rapaciously healthy about this fragrance.This is very earthy and organic... Imagine moist earth, moss, compost, mulch, and ash. On the Skin: Something raw and sweet joins the foray... Is this Honey? Perhaps a smidgen of carmelized Poppy? Singed Black Walnut? The Sweetness and Earthiness combine here in this stage and create something that could easily fit in with "Deep in the Earth" and "Zombi" and their ilk.Something in this is also mildly suggestive of Molasses or, maybe Sasafrass... The longer that Traipsing Through the Crop Circles sits on the skin, the more convincing it is of there being Poppy in here somewhere. This is a delirious, gifted fragrance. It evokes both wonderment and malicious mischief at every stage. Two 10 mL bottles of this would still have fallen well short of an adequate supply... The WIFE: (blinks in surprise) "I don't know, but, honestly? It reminds me of... Frogs." There is an attempt to clarify;"Do you mean dank or swampy?" Comes the reply as I am stared through, eerily, "Frogs". Traipsing Through the Crop Circles is magnificent on all levels. Passably unisex, but much more befitting His body chemistry. 5.5 out of 5!

:::THE AURORA SPACESHIP TAKES A DIVE::: The Black Helicopter Series kicks so much bum! Just when it seems like there's a dark at the end of the tunnel, another of these blends is given a try and the fascination begins afresh. There isn't too much familiarity with the notes listed in this one (the most recent encounter with a Flaming Windmill {hey, didn't Don Quixote think that was a Dragon? Windmill? Flaming?} being infuriatingly vague), but that did little to prevent The Aurora Spaceship Takes a Dive from leaving a big impression! The nanosecond that this bottle was espied at Bat's Day Black Market, it just had to be fiddled with! Poppy, in any incarnation, has proven to be a sure-fire hit every time! Who doesn't want to know what a BlueBell smells like? Texas Thistle? Cedar Sage? Sunflowers? Magnolia? Startled Jackalope? (just kidding about the Jackalope) The Aurora Spaceship Takes a Dive just reeks of a very good time for you and everyone trying not to make eye-contact! (Batteries not included!) From the Bottle: VERY bright and clean! Something much more rough-and-ready had been imagined for this one. Yeah, the floral notes were there all along but... Crash! Flaming Windmill! Cedar! Sage! Texas! Parts of the description for this fragrance made it seem like a sequence for an action movie. Well, to be fair, at this phase, it does seem manly in a soapy kind of way. A very chunky, uncontoured, geometrically concise, no-frills-blue bar of soap. At most, there is an anchor carved onto it's surface. Said bar of soap was likely transported home in the back of a work truck; alongside concrete-encrusted tools, exposed to direct sunlight and other generalised abuses. Said bar of soap is intended for those in dire need of de-spackling. The color Blue keeps making an impression. In this sense, The Aurora Spaceship Takes a Dive is very remniscent of the feeling you get after getting a big nosefull of Wilde... Without the "posh", though... A very BOY fragrance, to be sure at this stage. So far, there has been no sighting (smelling) of any sort of Windmill, aflame or no... Skinterstellar biochemical transmission report: Well, the soapy blueness has gone somewhat on the wane, while the note that wins the blue ribbon for ampage is... Magnolia! This smells exactly like a stroll through the Redlands Historical District late in the summer evening/early mornings. Right around 3 a.m., the Magnolias seem to slip right from their collage of waxy green leaves and float around your head in an undulating halo like so many jellyfish around a diving bell. Also magnificent is this Red Corn Poppy. Skepticism was efficiently blotted out once this note was recognised; it is very much the Poppy characteristic fragrance with an almost dusty undertone of unpopped popcorn! Cool! Bluebell is in there somewhere, but hard to discern. The Thistle and Cedar Sage pretty much hide the entire time. Woe... The Aurora Spaceaship Takes a Dive is an excellent addition to the Black Helicopter Series. This is definitely unisex. On Him, this fragrance has an almost nautical and ghostly feel to it. On Her, The Aurora Spaceship Takes a Dive would feel fresh, ethereal and adrift atop a roiling tide of stampeding thunderheads... This is a wild-eyed, wonderful scent! A glaring 5 out of 5!

:::REPTOID DOMINION::: Malevolent, Super-intelligent, Paradimensional, Shape-shifting, Reptoid musk, eh? Joy! The Black Helicopter series has been an exercise in unmitigated fondness, and deserves, truly, a spot of permanence in the BPAL GC. Even before the bottle was picked up for a cursory sniff at the Bat's Day Black Market, the Sleestakesque little face making puppy-dog eyes proved an irresistable marketing scheme... This one just begged to be taken home! A testimonial relating to the actual experience on the olfactory organs celebrating then? From the Bottle: Great Scot, that is clever! Reptoid Dominion is ANYTHING BUT timid! There is something in this that is sorta like the Lab's Leather note, but it... Isn't. Holy Habu, is that... Snakeskin? This fragrance is very reptoid, and it's... Aroused. Aroused? Malevolent? Super-Intelligent? Probes, you say? As in plural? *vapors* Now, where could that exothermic refrigeration device have gone to? Of course, it is only something Super-Intelligent that could smell THIS good! There is a unique sort of spicy/woodsy/florally undertone to the Musk in this that is close to (possibly) Tobacco Flower, and yet also has a passing resemblance to one or more of the notes in Antikythera Mechanism... Too good to pass up! On the Skin: Ooooh! Weird! When this was put on the wrist and held up for a sniff, it made TOTAL sense to use the tongue to smell more deeply!!! *shudder* This is sooooooo CRACKED OUT! What fun the Labbies must have when things such as this are concocted! What dread when they actually escape from the Lab! Howls of laughter are virtually audible! The sheer genius of BLACK phoenix Alchemy Labs scares the whites out the eyes! Reptoid Dominion is, every drop, EXACTLY what it promised via the description. How one even begins to take concepts that are pretty much limited to celluloid, tabloid, and urban legend and then translating them into an undeniable olfactory experience is a feat of superhuman proportions! This is the sort of handiwork typically associated with the likes of demons or demigods! Reptoid Dominion smells like the end of the concept of civilization... At least from the perspective of Homo Sapiens conceptualization. Wickedly smart stuff! Reptoid Dominion bypasses all etiquette and beats down the door in that old part of your brain that existed before that new-fangled, warm blooded idea thingy with "hair" on it. Reptoid Dominion is an unblinking gaze, awake and aware during intergalactic commutes. Reptoid Dominion makes clinical detatchment seem more like a yawn. Roughly 90 minutes after its initial application, Reptoid Dominion sweetens; becomes more of a saurean softie... A cuddlesome cobra. A snugglesome slitherer. On Him, Reptoid Dominion is astronomically accomplished. Reptoid Dominion is cosmically curvaceous on Her. Take advantage of the small remaining window and snatch one up! 5.5 out of 5!

:::THE SCALES OF DEPRIVATION::: The Scales of Deprivation was immediately snatched from the line-up at this year's Bat's Day. As one of the gloomy and doomy's from Sin and Salvation, the Apocalyptic associations had already elevated this one to the status of legend. 5mL of this was purchased unsniffed... From the bottle: The Frankincense, Lemon Peel, and Sage pop out right from the start. The way that these blend together prescribe a foxiness that is ordinarily associated with the goodies from the Wünderkammer from personal experience so far! And really... Has there ever been a Vetiver so... Slinky? This Vetiver has hips that orbit ball-bearings... This has a pavonine strut! The Scales of Deprivation is wickedness, but a gleeful, celebratory sort of wickedness! This is a fragrance to turn over stones and seek it out! Skincindiary!: Bow before this! The Scales of Deprivation is the fragrance to be annointed with as you're tethered, naked and spread-eagled, to be auctioned off for a debauch! Lavender and Labdanum converge for a lullaby of lust for lamentation...Deprivation is a good word! There is bleakness here, but there has never been a bleakness so beautiful! The Scales of Deprivation is a biting blindfold. The Scales of Deprivation is the perfume of paradise as smelled from the bottom of a pit littered with bone and ash.There is something cruel here too... Well, perhaps cruel is too strong a word. Impassive? Stoic? A sociopathic hearthrob? The Scales of Deprivation is a tantalizing twist on the prospects of abject depravity and sinister sullenness. There is a familiarity here that is desparagingly evasive... This is showing up at your own high-school reunion and entering the auditorium only to have it fall utterly silent while every head turns your way... And not being able to recognise a single face. The Scales of Deprivation is another spectacular victory from the prodigy perfumers at Black Phoenix Alchemy Labs. The wearer of this would cross the threshold of a church only to have the carpeting in the foyer catch fire beneath the soles of their feet. This is a great, bleeding ballyhoo! On Him, The Scales of Deprivation is calculating, manipulative, and surgically precise... The sort of scent that toys with you and giggles while you squirm in discomfort. On Her, The Scales of Deprivation is a sexy nurses uniform with many unfortunate, agonizing sensations associated with it. The Scales of Deprivation is a clarion-call of horrors released from their subterranean prison with the fingernails of God peeled back the horizon from the jagged edge of distant mountain ranges. The Scales of Deprivation is the most delicious misfortune realised. Escaping the hollow and lightless glory of the fragrance that is The Scales of Deprivation is but a foolish hope. Terrific!5.5 out of 5!

:::DEATH ON A PALE HORSE::: http://www.apocalyptic-theories.com/galler...yneshorsebg.jpg From the Bottle, Death On a Pale Horse smells much sweeter than those pesky preconceived notions! The Lab's notes listed both Vetiver and Patchouli, not to mention Yuzu, so the idea was that this fragrance was going to have an unsettling edge to it... A measure of despair if not a few glinty points of maliciousness. Death On a Pale Horse is very sweet at this stage; almost bringing "On Darkness" to mind. Chocolate and Poppies... Subtly medicinal. A brief ping of alcohol. On the Skin: The Patchouli has made an appearance, though in a guest starring sort of way. Lavender is somewhere way in the background, identifiable, but surprisingly faint. The Lime mixes with the Sandalwood and sharpens it... One of the first truly pointy bits to this fragrance! Vetiver has been too bashful to participate in Death On a Pale Horse, though, which is more than a little sad... The Lab has made this note one to appreciate. Death On a Pale Horse gets better the longer it sits on the skin. Some of the sweetness in this gets... Dessicated. Now, it is all the more apparent why this could be associated with the end of all things. There is a beauty here, but more in the maddening heartache that it is gone forever more. Unattainable... Death On a Pale Horse is a brilliant fragrance concocted by the Lab and no amount of applause could do it the slightest justice. The perspective from the Wife: Mmmmmmm... You smell like a Pina Colada! 0_o. On Him, Death On a Pale Horse is pure terror... It strongly suggests adopting submissive posture and body language. On Her, Death On a Pale Horse is a scarred tragedy that weeps tears of blood. Death On a Pale Horse is terribly beautiful. A flawless masterpiece. 5 out of 5!

:::THE LITTLE SPARROW::: The Little Sparrow was a spontaneous purchase when introductions were made at the Bat's Day Black Market this year. Head over heels for The Little Sparrow from the very first sniff!Sedge isn't something familiar at all until the wonderful world of BPAL, so this would be the first association. From the Bottle: There is a sweetness to this that is wholly remarkable! It is very much like a Balsam note; but probably closer to Hay Absolute... Which makes this worthy of comparison to Hay Moon... The Seeds can almost be felt between the teeth! There is very slight, "Feed Store" dustiness here that kind of ties the whole thing in to the Hay-type note.There is a super-slight bitterness in The Little Sparrow that has the dark green pungency associated with cracked shells... Anyone who favors unsalted Sunflower seeds or Pumpkin Seeds should recognise this almost immediately. The Brown Amber is good enough for glut and guilt! It is very much like tanned summer skin just waiting to be kissed. The Little Sparrow is sweet enough that the Sandalwood almost takes on characteristics of Rosewood; purply brown luxuriance! Skindecency!: There is a hint at soap here, but not enough to threaten the quality of the blend.This is not to say that the soapiness has any of the drying, alumn type characteristics, on the contrary; This soapiness has the feel more of well scrubbed skin that gows with health. Bathing in outdoor streams, whatnot... Amber and Sedge (?) are still the most dominant. The Little Sparrow has a very innocent and pastoral feel to it. The Little Sparrow is delightfully unisex. On Her, this is curvy, intriguing, beguiling, and frighteningly optimistic. On Him, The Little Sparrow is brawny, rustic, robust and mischievous. Exquisite! 5.5 of 5

:::TWILIGHT::: The fragrance of Twilight was just... Devastating. Though it was in the Ars Moriendi category AND predated the theatrical release of the talkie with the same title, there was no small measure of trepidation in the exploration of this scent. At the Bat's Day Black Market this year, there was unmitigated access to the entire catalogue of BPAL scents and monies were long reserved for the occasion, so a frenzy was well underway by the time Twilight was in the cross-hairs. The cap was opened... The love was intense and immediate. The whole world seemed to swoon to a standstill. Twilight was breathed in and seemed to bloom, pyrotechnically, in every available space inside the body... Intercellular void was readily occupied with a shimmering cascade of purple, magenta, and dark yellow, glittering sparks. Surrounding static evaporated and was replaced by something that sounded like Tori Amos, hard at work on a clavicord. Twilight is stately, aristocratic and otherworldly. Galactic gratitude radiates from the very core, resonating across infinities like embroyonic laughter that Twilight in NO WAY resembles MTV (Manicured Teen Vampires). Twilight is, in fact, the antithesis of camp. Twilight possesses a poise and sophistication light-years beyond pomp, frivolity, and municipal angst. The Lavender in Twilight has absolutely no overpowering characteristic. The boquet here has composure and elan. This is a very French Lavender. The night-blooming Jasmine brings a lustrous and penetrating perfume to Twilight that gives it resplendance and vitality.Honeysuckle weaves through Twilight with a sweetness that floats like bubbles through Honey and bears all the hallmarks of electrified religious fervor. Magnificent!Twilight is regally powerful. Twilight could be depicted as an army of warriors with the bodies of gymnasts and the heads of lions. The evening sky is royal purple velvet and filled with constellations of burning topaz...The captain wears a crown smeared with blood. He roars with bone-splintering ferocity and the tapetum lucidum blazes like a pulsar... Twilight is thus far unmatched by anything else in the Ars Moriendi section. Twilight is powerfully reverent. Twilight is enigmatic and pulsating. Twilight is an extraordinary, unisex fragrance. On Him, Twilight is golden, leonine, and incandescent. On Her, Twilight is a leonine conflagration, a darkening force of nature, a total eclipse. Twilight is a truly amazing perfume oil. Twilight earns an easy 5.5 out of 5.