I remember all the reasons I don't want Jason back anymore, and they're good ones. But when I told him I made a personals ad, he suddenly broke up with his girlfriend & spent hours on the phone begging me to take him back. WTF?! It's been a year and a half!

Another e-mail at lunch today was trying to wriggle past my defenses & make me think, what if? He was saying he's changed, and realizes what a terrible mistake he made, and he never wants to be without me, etc etc.

I think, even though I dislike all the drama he carries around with him, that e-mail got to me because I'm a quiet person with domestic ambitions & a pragmatic soul. I'm not a believer in the doomed epic love, with artistic angst & drugs & alcohol & whatever. Part of me is amazed at the idea that anyone would write that about me.

But still, he's a grown-up & makes his own decisions, and I make mine. My brain still feels solidly in control, and I'm looking forward to my new dating adventures. Except for that one voice in the corner that isn't getting with the program ...