I've been kind of grappling with that same thing in the past couple of years. I don't live in the city any more either, haven't been shopping in the Clark/Belmont area in ages, don't get up and roll out of bed and roll down the street to the coffeeshop and just hang out like I used to...

It's weird sometimes when I see 20-something people walking down the street because inevitably there's a young woman who's walking with them who reminds me of the way I used to look, and I think, "That used to be me." I miss that. I liked being that person.

I'm not even sure what happened. I'm 35 but I don't have kids and I'm in school. It would be very easy for me to have the same lifestyle I had when I was 25 -- but I don't. It's different now, somehow. Kinda feels like that boat has sailed.

A couple of months ago my husband asked me if we were free the next night for dinner with some people, and I said, "Tomorrow? Tomorrow night?" I sat there feeling dumbfounded that someone was asking for dinner tomorrow because I'm used to these conversations going like this: "Are you free on the 24th? Oh, wait, I can't get a sitter that night. Well it looks like we're going to have to do it in March, what do your March weekends look like?" It suddenly hit me that 10 years ago people would call and say things like, "Hey, I'm thinking about going to such-and-such for dinner, if you can be ready in 10 minutes I'll pick you up." And I'd go. When did this change? And why didn't I notice it?

Wow, I'm really rambling. Sorry about that. It's not that I don't like my life now, but it used to seem like it was a lot more fun. Maybe I need to do some redefining too.

i think everyone goes through that at some point. i'm 35, a mother to a 15yo, have a partner, full time job and i'm just too tired to have that lifestyle! my son will most likely move out before i'm 40 or if not, will be 21 when i'm 40 anyway, so i could in theory have that lifestyle back.........not sure i want it, though.

we look at people that remind us of ourselves a decade or longer ago as we are wistful for the freedom of those days, but we are different people now. it could be that we are no longer in control of every part of our lives. mortgages, families and grown up stuff do that to us!

can i join you with the wistful sighing at young vibrant women in their early 20s?

I miss freedom...now that I've moved away from the public transportation hubs, getting somewhere takes a fricking afternoon of planning. No more popping off to the bookstore or walking to the movies or whatever. I just want to be free...free to change my mind, my plans...my future. The older you get the harder it is. The more responsibilities you have for others...I think it's important to steal time for yourself even if its just lunching with a friend and some window shopping but I know for me it feels frustrating just to have to plan some "me" time, and I don't even have kids.